XY Sexual Wellness

Sexual wellness can sometimes be an uncomfortable or even taboo subject depending on where you’re from, your upbringing, your beliefs, and more. This doesn’t detract from the fact that it’s a critically important subject for discussion and one we should be having more regularly and openly. The simple fact is: you’re not alone if you’re experiencing struggles or have unanswered questions. Hopefully, we can help with some of those, from both a male and female perspective! 

 

What can I do about erectile dysfunction (ED)?

Erectile dysfunction can be a sensitive and frustrating issue for many men, but it’s important to remember how common this problem is. It is estimated that anywhere from 15-30% of American men aged 18-55 have experienced symptoms of erectile dysfunction at one point in their lives. Suppose you’re experiencing difficulty maintaining a quality erection. In that case, it is important to understand that symptoms could be caused by a variety of factors that may not always be exclusively physical or psychological, so you may consider talking to your doctor or healthcare professional if the symptoms persist and cause you more stress. Some things that have been shown to improve the quality of male virility include; maintaining a healthy diet, exercising regularly, abstaining from pornography and excessive masturbation, and managing stress with self-awareness habits can also help improve ED. The heavy emotions that come with ED don’t have to be yours alone to carry either. You should talk to your partner or doctor if something is bothering you. 

How can I improve my sexual performance?

Many men may feel pressure to perform to a certain unrealistic standard or even feel insecure about their performance in the bedroom. Much of this comes from the unrealistic interpretation created by how pornography is edited to make it seem like the man has excessive stamina and virility. It's important to remember that pornography isn’t realistic and even more important to remember that sexual performance is not the most important aspect of a healthy relationship. You and your partner have many alternatives to explore that do not rely on the quality of your sexual performance as a man, such as intimacy, emotion, and sensory exploration. However, there are some things you can do to improve your sexual virility, including staying physically active, exercising regularly, maintaining a healthy diet, managing stress, and communicating openly with your partner. Additionally, practicing mindfulness and being present during sexual activity can enhance pleasure and satisfaction. Ultimately when it comes to sexual performance, remember that it’s about the journey, not the destination.

What is premature ejaculation, and how can it be fixed?

Premature ejaculation is a common sexual issue that affects many men for different reasons. It's defined as ejaculating before or shortly after initiating sexual activity, often before either partner has reached a proper climax. Premature ejaculation can be caused by physical factors such as hormonal imbalances, but it is usually due to psychological factors like anxiety or depression. Because hormonal imbalances are unlikely, it is recommended to speak with your partner or therapist before seeking medication, as the solution to this sort of issue is once again likely rooted in the self-awareness and mindfulness of the individual. Treatment options may include medications, prescribed physical therapy like kegel exercises, or counseling to address underlying psychological factors.

How can I increase my libido?

A decreased sex drive or low libido can concern some men, but it is not always something to stress about, as stress may again be the underlying cause. It's important to remember that various factors can affect libido, including stress levels, physical wellness,  intimacy issues, and side effects from medication. The first thing one should always do when experiencing a decreased libido is to self-reflect and look inward. The root of a problem of this nature is almost always apparent with a bit of digging. To make efforts to increase libido, it's important to address any underlying physical or mental health conditions first, try to reduce stress in your life, and make an effort to communicate more openly with your partner. Additionally, incorporating regular exercise, eating a healthy diet, and getting enough sleep can help improve libido.

How do I stop watching pornography?

Porn addiction affects over 10% of the united population regardless of gender. Many sex therapists have agreed that porn inflates an unrealistic expectation of sex upon the male perspective, while porn harms women’s sexual confidence. These effects can lead to performance anxiety and dissatisfaction in both men and women. In 2013, Cosmopolitan magazine surveyed 68 top sex therapists in the United Kingdom. Of them, 86% felt that porn hurt their relationships, and 90% had seen increased relationship troubles due to porn use.


Here are some steps to take if you think porn addiction may be negatively affecting your life:

  • Accept That You Have a Problem If There Is One: Coming to terms with why you are giving it up helps you stay accountable whenever you are tempted to watch it. 
  • Remove access to porn: Whether deleting accounts or files or putting an NSFW content blocker on your devices, you need to remove your access to pornography entirely if you ever want to defeat an addiction.
  • Form a support network: It may be hard to open up about these things but try to remember why this may be a problem in your life and why you’re seeking help. Having someone or multiple people to keep you accountable for abstaining is crucial.
  • Don’t Beat Yourself Up If You Fall Off the Wagon: It’s not easy beating addiction of any kind. If you slip up, don’t be hard on yourself. Just commit to doing better the next time, look for inspiration from success cases, and then keep moving forward.
  • Replace your habits and triggers with healthier habits: Once you’ve learned to recognize what triggers you to want to watch porn, make a conscious commitment to adopting a healthy habit that you can easily trigger similarly. For example, if you’re feeling urges, do some pushups, wall sits, or go outside for a walk. 
  • Stay consistent: If porn addiction is a problem, don’t give up on a better life for yourself. Beating an addiction of any kind is not easy, and creating real change takes time and consistent intentions.

Here are five herbs that support male sexual wellness: 

Ashwagandha 

This herb is commonly used in traditional Ayurvedic medicine for its potential benefits in reducing stress and anxiety, which may, in turn, improve sexual function in men. A study published in the Journal of Sexual Medicine in 2011 found that men who took an Ashwagandha supplement for 60 days reported significant improvements in sexual function, including increased sperm count and motility, compared to those who took a placebo.

Panax ginseng 

This herb, also known as Korean ginseng, has been used in traditional medicine for centuries and has been studied for its potential benefits in improving sexual function in men. One study published in the International Journal of Impotence Research found that men who took a daily supplement containing Korean ginseng for eight weeks reported significant improvements in erectile function and overall sexual satisfaction compared to those who took a placebo.

Maca root 

This herb is traditionally used as an aphrodisiac and to improve sexual function and has been studied for its potential benefits in reducing stress and anxiety. A study published in the journal Andrologia in 2014 found that men who took a Maca supplement for 12 weeks reported significant improvements in sexual function, including increased libido and reduced levels of anxiety and depression, compared to those who took a placebo.

Tribulus Terrestris 

This herb is traditionally used to enhance athletic performance and sexual function in men and has been studied for its potential benefits in reducing stress and anxiety. A study published in the Journal of Ethnopharmacology in 2015 found that men who took a Tribulus terrestris supplement for 12 weeks reported significant improvements in sexual function, including increased testosterone levels and reduced anxiety and stress levels, compared to those who took a placebo.

Rhodiola Rosea 

This herb is traditionally used to reduce stress and fatigue and has been studied for its potential benefits in improving sexual function in men. A study published in the journal Phytomedicine in 2010 found that men who took a Rhodiola rosea supplement for 12 weeks reported significant improvements in sexual function, including increased erectile function and satisfaction, compared to those who took a placebo.

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